Ever since I can remember, I've been a people pleaser. I tried to please my parents, I tried to please my friends and teachers and I tried to please my husband and children. I've also tried to please God. The result was I was tired, frustrated and insecure. Somehow, in all of this, I got lost. I put on so many different faces that I never was really sure who I was.
These last few years, Father has been freeing me. He's been showing me that it's okay to be me. I've gotten to the place that I really like myself. Of course, there are things about myself that I would like to see change but I don't tend to stress about them any more. I know Father is still at work in me and, as I learn and grow in him, I'll see more and more freedom being released through my life.
I decided to blog about this because of some comments made by Joel and Livingsword on Joel's The answer is always B - 2/22/08 post. They discussed their blogs and the reason they blog. I thought it was interesting because I had never really thought about why I started blogging other than the fact that everyone seem to be having such a good time doing it. Joel made a statement that really resonated with me. He said, "The "extracurricular" things I put on my blog are not really an evangelism tool, so to speak, to attract others, but rather are simply things that represent a part of my personality."
That really stood out to me and, as I started thinking about the different blogs I keep up with, I can see pictures of the different personalities and interests. For example, Julie posted a recipe on her blog. Not only does the recipe sound yummy but it was an expression of the unique life of Jesus in her.
Blogging is an opportunity for me to express my unique personality. I'm free to be as serious or as unexpected as I want to be as the life of Jesus combined with my personality flows out of me. As with any adventure that Jesus initiates, I have no idea where this will lead but I do know that I'm glad he's invited me to go along with him on this journey of discovery.